The Miraculous in the Moment

RSCN0355

 

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”  — Albert Einstein

 

  • Trees budding, flowers blooming, and green grass carpeting the yard.
  • Cloudy skies heavy with rain, hail, or snow.
  • Lambs, colts, and calves with long, spindly legs playing in the pasture.
  • Ocean waves kissing the shore time and time again.
  • Mountains reaching to the heavens, touching the clouds, wearing snow late into the spring.
  • A man and woman meeting, getting to know each other, caring, loving, marrying, creating a new home…a new family.
  • A new baby… tiny, bubble blowing, starfish hands, — gentle, sweet, beautiful. Perfect.
  • Boys and girls, growing and learning, laughing and crying, becoming who God meant them to be.

 

How can we look on these things and not see the miraculous?

If Einstein is correct that there are only two ways to live our lives, then how can we choose to look at life as though the amazing, the awe inspiring, the joyous, and the beautiful things that surround us are anything less than miraculous?

I miss the days when everything that I watched seemed to be a miracle; it was back when my boys were small. As a mom, I watched them grow, stretch, turn over, crawl, walk, run, and climb. Every new skill and each new word seemed to be miracles in our small apartment. And that isn’t even remembering the ordinary moments that were also “miracles.” The things that I was use to:  the man who hugged me and reminded me that I belonged; the church where I was a Bible Study leader, a worker in the nursery, and a helper within the women’s ministries program; the law firm where I worked for an amazing retired judge — all of them were moments of blessing and privilege. Yes, many more ordinary miraculous moments followed these.

If we look at our moments, at the events of the life we lead as something that is less than miraculous, where will we find awe? When will we experience the wonder?

Miracles abound. People are healed — physically and emotionally. Provision is unexpectedly provided. Relationships are strengthened. We need to see the miraculous in the moment. It is important that we see God’s hand at work –moving in the world around us.

Yes, sadly, the world is broken. It is filled with sin and loss and hurt and distress. But, even in the midst of this darkness, God is still at work! We cannot deny His work — and yet it is easy to focus on the darkness so much that we fail to see the light…we fail to see the miraculous. The miracles abound in lives healed and souls saved. God’s miraculous touch is seen in the beauty that abounds in the desert, the mountains, the ocean, the smile of a child, the hand-holding couple celebrating 70 years of marriage, and the cross at the top of a steeple celebrating God’s work in His people.

Find them. Find the miraculous moments and celebrate them. Thank Him for them.

“So, my very dear friends, don’t get thrown off course. Every desirable and beneficial gift comes out of heaven. The gifts are rivers of light cascading down from the Father of Light.” — James 1:17-18a, The Message.

Earnest Expectations

DSCN2474

 

Ruidosa, New Mexico: Bonita Park Nazarene Camp Grounds. Teen camp. A rainstorm caused the camp fire to be cancelled. What do you do with 150 teens who are expecting a camp fire? Well, you take them to the tabernacle and you show a movie.

18: NO TIME TO WASTE.

A life changing film. It tells the story of an 18 year old girl who lived her life with a passion for serving the Lord; but then she died at the age of 18. Her heart’s desire was to tell people about Jesus — and she did. Philippians 1:20-21 were her life verses. Soon after watching the movie, I searched Christian book stores for the book; I finally ordered a copy.

“According to my earnest expectation, and my hope, that in nothing shall I be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now shall Christ be magnified in my body, whether it be by life or by death. For to me to live is Christ, to die is gain.” -Philippians 1:20-21, NIV.

These verses became my life verses as well.

What is an earnest expectation? For me, my earnest expectation is what I desire — no expect — to see in my actions, the way I choose to live my life. I expect that I will serve the Lord; I expect that I will follow Him wherever He may lead me. My expectation and my hope is that I will do nothing to shame the name of my Savior. I don’t mean to be cynical, but there are enough folks in this world who are giving God a black eye by not walking their talk. I don’t want to be one of those people. The high expectations that I have of myself are ones that I can live up to because God is God and He is my guide. It is through His power and His strength at work in me that I can fulfill these desires, hopes, and expectations.

I desire and expect that I will magnify Christ — that I will show this world who He is. By choosing to serve God and giving Him complete control of my life, I have determined that my journey through life will be guided by Him. It may mean hard times or great times, but whatever life brings, I’ve asked Him to take charge and be in complete control. Many may not understand that decision; but I have confidence in His leading.

If He chooses LIFE for me — great, I’ll serve Him! And if He chooses DEATH — then I am heaven bound! Either way, I win.

We can never be too casual in our decisions. I can imagine three pastors in New Mexico sitting around planning a teen camp. One of them probably said something like, “You know, we could have a rain storm, what should we do in case of rain?” The other two probably agreed that they needed a “Plan B.” Someone had to find a movie. They probably talked about it and prayed for guidance. Then God showed them the movie that would impact a 15 year old girl. I’m sure that same film impacted others that night too, but I know without a doubt that watching that story, and later reading it, changed my life, my heart, my dedication, my focus, and most of all, my commitment. Our decisions impact others; they have the power to change lives.

What were the expectations of those pastors for that short film shown during a rain storm? Did they expect the impact to be life changing? I think so…I hope so. When I act, when I make decisions that have the power to impact those around me, do I earnestly expect to magnify Christ through that choice?

Help me, Jesus, to live in the power of that verse everydayAmen.

 

A Time to Mourn…

A Colorado rainbow seen from our front deck following a spring storm. Rainbows remind me of God's goodness, His grace, and His promises.
A Colorado rainbow seen from our front deck following a spring storm. Rainbows remind me of God’s goodness, His grace, and His promises.

A Time for Everything

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:                                                           a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.                                                             -Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NIV)

Thank you for being patient with me.

You see, I do not like being a person who is not “in control” of my emotions. Yet that is exactly what I am experiencing — a lack of control. People think I’m upset or angry. I’m not — I’m sad; I’m grieving. I’ve observed others grieve and have often wondered at the way they do so. Some people are strong — they are a rock solid. It turns out that I am nothing more than marshmallow cream when I grieve. Hugs make me cry. Funny stories make me cry. Sad stories make me cry. Pictures and memories — even good ones — make me cry. It doesn’t take much to make me cry these days.

Quite frankly, that annoys me! I am extremely independent and I’ve always been a “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” kind of person and I am helpless to be able to do that now. I so desperately want to go back to being able to function without this overwhelming sense of grief and loss. I know it will take time, but I’m impatient.

A dear friend taught me somethings about grief — thankfully. It was after our nephew died; she knew I was struggling and because of her experience working as a Hospice Chaplain, she was able to help me through that time. She taught me that it takes about two years to work through the grief of one loss. Each new loss is tacked on to the end of that two years — concurrent grieving is apparently not possible. I learned about grief bursts — a time of overwhelming, unexplainable, and uncontrollable grief. Grief bursts can happen without any perceived provocation and they must simply be endured. As pastors, my husband and I have often told those who grieve in our church that while the first year of grief is hard, the second year is often more difficult. It is in the second year that we realize the permanence of our loss — the second Christmas is when you realize that your loved one will never sit at the table with the family again.

In my brain, I know these things. In my heart, I want to fast forward through this time of loss and pain. I don’t like being treated like I’m breakable, but in some ways, I am very fragile. Kindness seems to be one of the worst responses I receive because it makes me feel weak — but I am weak. You see, no matter how much I hate feeling this way, right now I need kindness, gentleness and support. I am so grateful that God is in control, that family is loving, and that friends and coworkers are kind.

I will cope better…probably not tomorrow and maybe not even the next day, but soon. In the meantime I will try to remember that there is a time to mourn and this is that time. Thank you for walking this journey with me. For loving and caring, for praying. Soon, it will be time to dance. I can hardly wait.

Not My Words…

Texas Sunset, February 2014 (Ignore the powerline!)
Texas Sunset, February 2014 (Ignore the powerline!)

It’s been a month….

  • a month since I lost my brother
  • a month in which our family had a vacation
  • a month with many great memories
  • a month filled with confusion and frustration
  • a month of questions
  • a month filled with . . . I’m not sure what . . .

One goal that I had when I started this blog was that I would be open and transparent with my family, my friends, and my readers. And so I shall be.

This month had some great moments for which I am deeply grateful. However, it has also been a month of questions, stress, loss, and grief. To be completely honest…I have nothing to say — certainly nothing profound. In fact, I barely have any words at all.

Thankfully, God has not been silent. I have decided to share with you the things that He has reminded me of as in my pain I’ve clung to Him through worship, as we’ve traveled, as I’ve sung, read, studied, and prayed.

Reminders from God’s love…

  • Nothing that has happened (or will happen) is a surprise to God.
  • When I feel alone, I simply need to reach out because He never leaves His own.
  • I don’t have to know what He’s doing because I know who He is. (Thank you J.J. Heller for that powerful song! If you haven’t heard it, check it out on You Tube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F8jilr8qsYU)
  • Seek His kingdom first.
  • He is my song.
  • When I am in darkness, (emotionally, mentally, spiritually) His light shines brighter than ever!
  • The safest place to be is in the midst of His will . . . whether I understand it or not.
  • When I am weak He is strong.
  • I need Him every moment of every day.
  • He makes amazingly beautiful things.
  • Family is a gift to be treasured.
  • “My heart can rest in His embrace…for I am His*; and He* is mine.” (“Oceans” by HillSong United. *Words changed.)
  • He has surrounded me with amazing, Godly people.
  • He loves me.

Maybe you needed to hear from Him the way I needed to this month. He’s speaking . . . I’m still listening. Won’t you listen with me?

Forget Me Not

My family.
My family.

The Forget Me Not… the state flower of Alaska.

Every morning for 53 years, 2 months, and 6 days I’ve awakened secure in the knowledge that my big brother was never farther away than a phone call. Tomorrow — if I manage to sleep — my world will be drastically different.

I’m one of four children. My two sisters and my only brother preceded me into the family in that order. That means that I was the youngest. While some folks think that being the youngest makes your life a piece of cake, others know the cold, hard facts. Having a big brother is both a blessing and a curse.

The  curse of being the little sister…

  • Muscles — his not mine.
  • Catching him smoking behind the garage and me being stupid enough to try to use it as blackmail material.
  • Him telling me (and then Dad) that the crush I had on one of his friends WASN’T a good idea.
  • Doing dishes while he practiced his boxing…. on my right shoulder.

But honestly, the blessings far outnumbered the curse…

  • Building snowmen together.
  • Being mad at our older sisters together.
  • Being the most popular Indian Maid in the all school Thanksgiving Pageant in 1st grade. (Frank threatened all of his 4th grade friends that when the Indian Maids were drug to the front of the stage, I had better not be the only girl left at the back of the stage.)
  • Watching him wrestle; watching him box.
  • Calling him when I got on the bad side of a pretty tough bunch of kids at school — coming out of the junior high to see him standing by my bus that first day and then, finding him under the tree near the bus stop everyday after school for the rest of the year.
  • Learning early on that he could hit me but no one else had that same privilege.
  • Phone calls on birthdays.
  • The most amazing card in the whole wide world about me being his sister.
  • My big brother shaking my newly acquired husband’s hand after the wedding, tightening the grip just a fraction, and telling Mr. Gorgeous that he was to take care of me. Frank passed the reigns in that simple move…er, threat?
  • An amazing niece and two incredible nephews — yes, Michael was incredible even though I never got to meet him. After all, he was my brother’s son.

God designed families. He knows that in loving our family members our lives are richer. He knows that in losing our family members we are drawn closer to the source of love…Jesus Christ.

I have amazing memories of my big brother who always seemed somehow bigger than life. I know and understand that he was not perfect, but who on earth is?  I know that the loss of a child and later a divorce nearly destroyed him. I know that God uses broken things — after He has mended them, and that He used my brother.

I prayed for my brother for years, asking God to bring Frank to a relationship with his Heavenly Father. While teaching in a private, Christian school in California, I asked my class of 5th graders to pray for Frank. I remember a young boy asked if he could pray for him right then. I thanked him and told him to go ahead. The boy prayed. In the arrogant way of adults, I just shook me head at what the boy prayed. He asked God to send someone from his hometown in Northern California to Alaska to tell my brother about Jesus. A year and a half to two years later my brother accepted Jesus as His Savior. I was thrilled. Later, my brother and I talked on the phone and he asked the name of the town I had taught in while living in California. I told him. He said something about how weird that was and I, of course, asked why. He told me about the church he was attending. It was fairly new and had been planted by a Baptist Minister from the very town where I had taught. I learned to stop being skeptical of the power in a child’s prayer.

I am thankful for my brother, for the bruises and the quarrels. I am thankful for the hugs and the protection and the rides here and there. I am grateful for my memories — I wish I had time to make more of them.

When he first left for Alaska, I bought a package of Forget Me Not seeds and I planted them in my yard so that I could feel close to him. I think it’s time to buy another package. One day, I will see him again, but until then I will Forget HIM not.

Beauty Surrounds Me

After the snow fall the sun shines and the snow sparkles.
After the snow fall the sun shines and the snow sparkles.

I live in Colorado, how could I NOT be surrounded by beauty:

  • The beauty of a blue sky, sun shining with a bald eagle circling on the wind currents.
  • Snow covered branches dancing in the breeze.
  • Spring wildflowers blooming on the mountain in my back yard.
  • Clear, cool streams filled with ice cold water flowing over mossy rocks.
  • Puppies playing chase in the yard.
  • Towering peaks high above the valley.
  • Leaves dancing in the wind.
  • Quarter-size snowflakes drifting slowly to the ground.
  • The perfection of a newborn baby.
  • The tenderness of a loved one’s touch.

Beauty.

It surrounds me every day and yet there are days when I simply fail to realize that it exists, that it is there. I am encompassed by a world filled with things that are far from mundane, and yet my day-in, day-out life seems pretty routine and ordinary most of the time. Rather than seeing the beauty in an adolescent’s smile, I see the behavior that caught my attention. I don’t notice the beauty of the snow fall, I notice the slick sidewalk and slippery roads. Instead of celebrating the past and the memories I treasure, I see the work and the tasks that I need to accomplish today.

How can I begin to once again focus on the beauty?

When I was growing up my mom had a saying, “Two men looked out from prison bars; one saw mud and one saw stars.”

How can I focus on the stars?

I have decided to take on a new challenge. My goal is to focus on the positive. I was always an optimist; I saw the good in people, in things, in situations, and even in challenges. But lately, I’ve noticed that I am not as positive as I use to be. That has to change.

In a science class somewhere I learned about flying. I know that the attitude of a plane controls where it goes. If it is true in a plane, I believe that it is also true in a human. Therefore, my attitude changes today. Here. Now.

No more will I allow the circumstances in which I live or work control my attitude. It is too easy to allow little things to take hold of us — to become the focus of our thoughts and our behaviors. Rather than looking at the tasks I must do, I will look around me as I move through this journey of life. I am choosing to see the beauty, to hear the laughter, to feel the warmth of the sun and the embrace of welcoming relationships. The changes won’t come quickly, they won’t be automatic or easy. But, with God’s help, I will remember to see the beauty because I want to be the “old” me.

I want to see the stars!

Aspiration and Accomplishment

An old stagecoach allowed many travelers to accomplish their aspiration of finding a new home.
An old stagecoach allowed many travelers to accomplish the aspiration of finding a new home.

I accepted Jesus as my savior when I was four years old. I had on a red dress. Is it weird that I remember what I was wearing? As I grew up, I rededicated myself to the Lord as my understanding and knowledge of Him grew. My focus was almost always on doing and being what and who God wanted me to be. (I say “almost always” because I was a teenager for a few years!)

I wanted adventure; I wanted to travel; I wanted to serve God in amazing ways. My hope was that I would impact the world around me and help people see God. However, God wired me to be a “homebody” so my place of service would naturally be close to home. I still want adventure — with Mr. Gorgeous. I definitely want to travel — with people I care about and love… and then, I want to go home, to our 910 square foot house and two dogs. And yes, the kids too, even though they are growing up and launching their own lives. Of course I want to serve God in amazing ways — wherever He sends me.

Scott Wesley Brown recorded a song when I was a teen called, “Please Don’t Send Me to Africa.” I sincerely don’t recall ever praying that (maybe I did), but I do remember being terrified that God would call me into a world I didn’t know or understand to “do” ministry. In fact, I was called to be a minister when I was 12 years old. But, I grew up in the 70s when women’s liberation seriously impacted the role of women in the church. You see, I believe that the church as a whole, had a “knee jerk” reaction to women in ministry because of the women’s liberation movement, which at times seemed to be incredibly selfish. (The movement is an unrelated topic — maybe I’ll blog about it another day!) So, back to the topic at hand. I didn’t know any woman who was a pastor. In fact, I hadn’t even heard of women pastors. My thinking went something like this, “If I’m suppose to be a minister, I’ll have to figure out what that means. The only women ministers I know are missionaries (Africa) and youth pastors. I don’t want to go to Africa to minister so I guess I’ll be a youth pastor.” Thankfully, God continued teaching and leading and I came to understand the true calling that He had placed on my life.

Today, a beautiful young woman — a former student — left Colorado for eleven months. She will be serving with the World Race, a ministry through Adventures in Missions. She will visit and minister in eleven different countries in Africa, Europe, and Asia. I’m proud of her and will be praying for her every day. This amazing young woman has shared with me about her trip for months. I’ve listened and prayed and encouraged — as literally hundreds of people have. But somewhere in the midst of supporting her preparation for ministry, I stepped back and looked at what she is doing and I looked at what I have done.

I think it is easy to get into the comparison game. Really, comparison often precedes dissatisfaction in our lives. Comparison can be a source of temptation that Satan uses in our lives. We see what someone else has, or is, or does, and suddenly, we have the desire to have, to be, or to do the same thing — or something bigger… better. When we were newlyweds Mr. Gorgeous and I loved to visit open houses. We would go look at the model homes: the beautiful furniture, the space, the gorgeous kitchens, the dishwashers, and the amazing bathrooms. One day, we were talking about going on a date and thought we might find an open house or furniture store to wander through. As we talked about the possibilities we came to the conclusion that we needed to stop doing both of those things. We needed to stay out of new, spacious, gorgeous houses. We needed to stay away from fancy furniture showrooms. All that they did for us was cause us to see what we didn’t have… and sometimes, they made us want more. And while wanting “more” isn’t wrong, for us, it was a distraction that pulled us away from God’s best for us.

It is okay to aspire to do great things. Having a dream, a wish, a hope, a plan is fine as long as we remember Proverbs 19:21. “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” (NIV.)

It is living out the Lord’s purpose that brings us to accomplishment.

Honestly, in many ways, I wish that I had traveled the world when I was younger — but that isn’t me.

I aspired to serve God with all that is in me; and I STILL aspire to serve God with everything that I am. God called me to my place of ministry: a classroom, a church, a home, a family, a blog. Really, my aspirations have been accomplished. I have ministered, loved, prayed for, cried with, cared about, and encouraged the people that God has brought into my path. Friends, I’ve not accomplished everything yet — I still have more aspirations and will continue to serve God wherever He leads me. I doubt it will be on three continents in eleven months, but I am thankful that God called my friend to go. He didn’t make me to be that kind of an adventurer. I don’t have to feel badly that I didn’t travel the world and talk about Jesus… students that I taught, church members we’ve loved, relatives we’ve prayed for are going because that is where God has called them to serve.

Thankfully, He made us individuals and as we call on Him, He will give us a place of service — wherever it may be.  “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

Words

The beauty of God's creation can speak to us and encourage us on even the coldest days.
The beauty of God’s creation can speak to us and encourage us on even the coldest days.

Words have power; they have strength.

God’s Word warns us that the tongue is able to build up… or it can destroy.

As I look back over 2013, I have been thinking about words that have changed my world — some for good, and some… not so much. Here are few that changed my world in 2013:

  • I think you need a hug…
  • As Christians we often talk about developing a “personal relationship” with Christ, but instead of pursuing a relationship, we pursue knowledge (Leonard Sweet)…
  • You challenged my son…
  • The scores aren’t as high as we wanted them to be…
  • Goodbye, Grandma…
  • There’s been an accident…
  • Please pray for our boys…
  • Goodbye Reid…
  • I have questions for the coach…
  • God is working in this place — look at who we use to be, see who we are…
  • We came to minister and as always, we’ve been blessed and ministered to…
  • Don’t postpone the joy…
  • They are closing us down…
  • Can I pray for you?

It’s been quite a year. A year of highs and lows. But then, aren’t most years? As I’ve come to the end of this year, I feel hopeful and positive. Yet in some ways, there is a sense of defeat that is floating around the edges. Even in the difficulties and the challenges, I’ve seen and sensed God’s hand working. Knowing that He is working makes even the hardest days bearable. In the midst of those hard days, it seems as though God places jewels — nuggets of encouragement and hope.

Sometimes those nuggets exist in nature — a sunrise, a snow covered mountain, a frolicking fox, a beautiful eagle flying overhead, leaves dancing in the wind. Often, they are found in the words and actions of others — a hug, a smile, a child’s laughter, a phone call, a friend’s words in prayer. The gift of music can also bring those jewels to mind — “What if your blessing comes through raindrops; what if Your healing comes through tears? What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near?” (“Blessings” performed by Laura Story). And more importantly, God uses His Word to make the difference — “I am leaving you with a gift–peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.” John 14:27, New Living Translation.

As I’ve been challenged and blessed by words in 2013, I want to start 2014 with God’s words and with a renewed challenge and along with that, a blessing.

“And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

-Micah 6:8, NIV.

Getting Ready for Christmas

The illuminated manger sitting by the Church Christmas tree.
The illuminated manger sitting by the Church Christmas tree.
Our Christmas tree awaiting the star on the top and strands of silver stars that surround it.
Our Christmas tree awaiting the star on the top and strands of silver stars that surround it.

I love Christmas. It is an amazing season of the year. It is a time to celebrate the birth of our Savior.

Christmas is also a time for family and for making memories. Mr. Gorgeous often teases me about our shed having one box of autumn decorations, one of Easter decorations, and six or more filled with Christmas decorations. It may be possible that I go a tad bit overboard for Christmas — slightly possible, that is. I love to decorate for the Christmas season. When our boys were small we had two foot tall Christmas trees in their room and our room. The boys was decorated with wooden blocks and toy cars. It was, after all, their tree. Our tree had only lights on it — red chile pepper lights, to be exact. When we moved to Colorado to pastor the church, the parsonage was quite small and we quit putting trees in the bedrooms. In fact, during our first Christmas here we realized that our tree was too large for the small living room. We managed to use it that first year, but the next year we bought a “low carb” tree — one with smaller hips, also known as a “slim line tree.” It fits perfectly in the living room.

Within our decorations you will find memories and traditions. Nearly everything that we have tells a story. There is the fox on skis that I got the year I learned to cross country ski. The Santa driving a forklift that Mr. Gorgeous received when he became a certified forklift operator. There is a tuba; it’s from Ben’s year as a tuba player in the CHS marching band. The black and white comedy/tragedy mask ornament is a symbol of Phil’s first professional opera season. Before Nate left home and took his ornaments, there was an enormous gorilla lifting weights — that one is probably self explanatory. When Nate married Maira, she wore gorgeous purple high heels — she now hangs a purple high heel ornament on their tree. There are ornaments that were handmade by our boys, some that were gifts, many sea shells, and numerous musical ornaments. Standing on a small shelf in the living room, you will see a two foot tall Victorian Santa — a gift from a family in one of the churches we pastored. So many things, so many memories.

Unfortunately, this year… well, I’m kind of not in the mood to decorate. It’s been a tough few months. Our church has lost some folks who have moved; other folk are wintering elsewhere. John is losing his “job” at the end of the year. Finances are tight. The mines in our area have laid off more than 200 miners resulting in our school district being financially stressed. The “Common Core” and new laws regarding teachers are making my job more stressful than fun. Emotionally, I’m exhausted. Honestly, I hadn’t realized how much these events had effected me until I began struggling to decorate our house.

The deck is lit with a star and LED lights, the tree is up — it doesn’t have a topper yet and the chains of stars that have been on our trees for years haven’t been located, but it has lights and decorations. I will finish decorating; I will. But more than decorate, I will celebrate.

Christmas is precious to me and so are the decorations. However, the reason we celebrate Christmas is the thing that will get me through these stressful weeks. This Sunday, when I walk into church, the manger will be sitting by the Christmas tree — it will be filled with white lights that are covered by tulle. That precious reminder will bring me once again to place of hope, to a spirit of peace, to a heart of thanksgiving. I’m more than ready. At some point during the next few weeks, I will ask our people to bring their problems to Jesus — to lay them in the manger; to remind themselves that Jesus came to be light in the world AND light in our hearts. Before then, though, I will remind myself again (and again and again and again) until I really remember, that the tree and all of the STUFF are intended to point us to the true reason to prepare for Christmas… the presence of Christ in our world, in our homes, in our hearts… in MY heart.

Yes, I will finish decorating but I think that before I do, I need to do some housecleaning. Really, I need to do some heart cleaning. That is my priority one in getting ready for Christmas this year.

God Provides

Image

There are times when times are tough. Times when you come to the end of the money before you come to the end of the month. Perhaps the doctor delivered news you’d rather not hear. Or maybe your children are struggling and you aren’t able to make a difference. It is in times like this when we need to be reminded that God is the God of all circumstances and that even in our darkest moments, God provides His grace, His provision, His care, and His love.

We had been pastoring for 1 1/2 years or so and along with working at the church John was working at Wal-Mart to help us pay the bills. He had gotten paid and we bought our groceries. It had been a “good check” so we had stocked up on meat, eggs, milk — pretty much everything that we would need for the next two weeks or so. That was Thursday. Saturday morning we got up and discovered the refrigerator was wonderfully warm — and all of our food was spoiled. The church sent a representative to an auction and bought a beautiful “new” to us refrigerator. But we still didn’t have food. Before the refrigerator was delivered, a couple of vans from a church in a city about 70 miles away showed up, knocked on our door and completely covered the floor of our living room with grocery bags filled with food. They brought two coolers with meat, milk, and eggs in them. There was a box with 144 rolls of toilet paper — we know because Phillip counted them. They didn’t know that our refrigerator died. They had decided to bless us and our church about two months before our refrigerator died. God provided in a miraculous way. He knew when we would need it.

Christmas was always a season of profound blessing for us in our early years of ministry. We have always pastored small churches that had limited resources. During those early years, large churches would “adopt” us and give us the kind of Christmas that these larger churches would provide for their own pastors. One year we were adopted by two churches. It was amazing. One of the churches provided a food pounding that filled our pantry to the point of overflowing. The other church gave us gift certificates to a local grocery store. The gift certificates provided the fresh food items we needed to combine with the food pounding items to provide  delicious and nutritious meals. God provided meals for months.

In our first church, a couple in our church would show up at our door the week after Thanksgiving every year with potatoes to eat all winter and fresh oranges to keep our boys healthy. When our district leader or an evangelist would be eating Sunday lunch at our house, the same couple always showed up with huge roast or a big ham. God provided — as He always did.

God’s miraculous provision for us in every instance had one thing in common. He used His people to meet our need. People who were called by Him to serve and to care for others. Did those people know how much of a blessing they had provided? Do they know that even today our children — our young men — will look at each other during difficult times and say, “God always provides?”

One year we had faced some unexpected financial challenges and it was getting close to the beginning of the school year. We were getting things together for the boys to return to school. One Sunday morning after church, a lady from our congregation came up to John and I to tell us that she and her husband would like to provide our children’s school supplies. The boys and I met her at Wal-Mart. She looked at my sons and instructed them to each pick out the following items: 3 pairs of jeans, 5 shirts, 7 pair of socks, 7 pair of scivvies (unmentionables), a pair of shoes, a new coat, and a backpack. She then picked up school supply lists from the display at the front of the store and proceded to fill her cart with everything on three school supply lists. In addition, she purchased extra pens, pencils, and notebook paper. The following Sunday, the boys were dressed in their new clothes to go to church. Nate performed a perfect model’s pose and said, “Because Frances is Jesus with skin on, I’m Nathan with jeans on.” Once again, God’s provision was abundant. And once more, He used His obedient children to meet our need.

The examples I’ve given have been of God meeting our tangible, physical needs. But our God meets EVERY need we have. When our needs are tangible — He meets them. When it’s financial — He provides. If we are sick — He heals. When we need encouragement — a card, a note, or a phone call comes. God meets our needs — sometimes through the obedience of His children and sometimes through His omniscient power and a miracle. No matter how He chooses to do it, God provides.